Maitri –

After a few months of dating a white guy, he said, “You’re witty, beautiful and I found you here in America. I didn’t even have to go to an Indian village with 40 goats in tow.” So glad I left that asshole behind.

Tadjio –

She had to positively beat the men away with a stick (we worked in a high-traffic spa so we saw a lot of people on a daily basis.) One evening the began complaining to me about these older, white men who just would not leave her alone.

I told her that white men have this romantic idea of Asian women as being demure-yet-sexy little “Yes my Master” types towards their men. Her eyes grew enormous and she absolutely burst out laughing. “That’s how we are in PUBLIC!” she explained, amazed that anyone had actually “bought” what she thought of as an act. “But in private — ” she pantomimed grabbing everything within arm’s reach and hurling it across the room at an imaginary husband.

I can’t say that my friends group is a good representation of Asian women as a whole, but of the Asian women I know (Chinese, Vietnamese, Korean, Thai) they seem just as swift as American women to rip you a new one if you cross them. If you talk to Asian men (most of my guy friends are Chinese), many of them seem somewhat cowed by women of their own culture, for exactly the reasons that white men are supposed to be turned off from “Western” women — they cite Asian women as being too “controlling”, too “demanding”, etc.

I think this whole “exotic flower” notion is a pervasive myth about Asian women — which is perpetuated, I’m sure, by a sort of cultural precedent in Asian countries as well as in America. But it doesn’t matter if the Asian “ideal woman” is one of these quiet/shy/subservient types; from what I’ve seen your average Asian woman only mimics this stereotype, and then only in public venues.

(Also, anecdotally I’ve spoken to several men who claimed that a Korean ex-girlfriend would come at them swinging during an argument. I don’t know how common this is in the population as a whole, but I’ve heard several stories to this effect.)

nijireiki –

Dude. In the first highlighted box I got so angry that I heard Christian Bale’s voice cursing out at the screenshot from within my mind. That’s. never happened to me before. The Christian Bale thing, not the rage.

Sounds like these guys need to meet some of my tough Hmong friends from out in the Midwest. It’s a lot harder to fetishize someone as “gentle and loving” and “think[ing] of [you] first” when they’re kicking your ass.

Lynn –

“One of my students said the whole “Wonderfully easy to be with” section made her think of the way people describe breeds of dogs”

splack –

“Asian culture”? Oh lord. It is hard to believe an Asian woman created the site. And as a white woman, I cannot even fathom the shit Asian women have to put up with daily. The closest I can come to understanding is when I had blonde hair — men would act as if I was walking around in a bikini, sucking a lollipop. Craziness.

It’s also interesting how this site pits women against each other, at least for the benefit of the (presumed) male audience.

Jack –

What I see here is men and women who have a desire to find a mate, it’s not our business what other people find attractive, or not attractive. I don’t see any laws being broken, and everyone seems to be of their own free will in viewing this site.