One of the neat things about sex (other than the really serious sexual climaxes, ofc) is that there are a whole lotta ways to have it. And while dental intercourse and outercourse (AKA foreplay) tend to be universally loved, the more complicated “rectal intercourse” usually incites a very mixed array of emotions, especially if you’re new to the concept of butt play. The good news is, there are plenty of expert-advised tips, tricks, and factoids to keep in mind if you want to learn how to have anal sex. And trust us, you do want to learn.

You see, anal sex is an A+ play option because it’s pleasurable for all genders, but it does require a bit more preparation than, say, missionary intercourse. Since the anus doesn’t self-lubricate like the vagina, you desire lube (like, lots and lots of lube) and plenty of foreplay to have good anal sex, explains ASTROGLIDE‘s resident sexologist Jess O’Reilly, PhD.

Second, ensuring you’re comfortable talking openly and honestly with your partner is essential when having anal sex, says University of Connecticut health department ob-gyn Shon Cooper, MD. This is because despite what you might have seen in naughty video clips or (ethical!) porno, good anal sex-like the type that feels good for both partners-doesn’t just happen. There’s a whole lotta prep work that goes into doing the deed. “Expectations should not be what you see on TV or read about,” says Dr. Cooper. “It’s what you and your partner talk about because the criterion and fulfillment during intercourse.”

Between the lubricant, the fresh new messaging, plus the foreplay, there is a lot to remember when examining butt play. This is why we’ve conferred to your professionals to come up with all this work-nearby rectal intercourse book. Whether you’re willing to try new things otherwise are only providing the discover into (love to view it), this is how to own rectal-a anal!-and you may walk away having an enthusiastic unscathed boot-ay.

step 1. Heat things with playthings or lubricant.

Warming lube can help heighten pleasure and make you even more comfortable in the moment. “The heat that is created actually helps to bring blood flow to the area and help increase stimulation to the pleasure receptors in the rectum/anus,” Niket Sonpal, MD, in the past informed Cosmopolitan.

But if warming lubricants aren’t your thing, no big deal. Consider trying a heating masturbator that heats up to just above your body temperature. Similarly to lube, it’ll help relax your muscles and get the blood flowing for what’s to come.

dos. Visit the toilet right after you’re done.

Just like peeing after vaginal intercourse is a must to help prevent UTIs, it’s important to go to the bathroom after anal as well. “During anal sex, there is a displacement of habitant organisms near the anus toward the vagina and urethra, which increases the chances of vaginal infections and UTIs,” says Ankita Gharge, MD. There’s a good chance you’ll probably feel like you have to go to the bathroom anyway.

step three. Learn the couch is probably probably queef.

After anal sex, you may have today, commercially, open yourself up to this new joy out-of ass queefs. With no, they’re not farts, regardless of the anybody states. Extremely simply, “a queef is a launch of sky,” claims Dr. Jess. “It does appear to be a fart, and it may occurs during the rectal penetration as air is zoosk vs match number of users forced from inside the plus it has to refrain.”

Rather than frontal queefs, anal queefs may go for the for a few occasions as the air escapes. You can’t really avoid them, however, “the greater slutty you are, the fresh not likely you will end up worried about specific sounds,” demonstrates to you Dr. Jess, therefore simply let go appreciate. On the bright side, you’re a human beatbox, along with your mate is also set an unwell freestyle over the top whenever they become thus more inclined.