But to make matters worse they are both saying they are transgender. This was a complete shock to all of us. Not that we wouldn’t accept it. She had never shown any signs that she was not comfortable in who she was. I am so confused because she was such a beautiful young woman and was always “boy crazy”. She chopped off her long beautiful hair and dresses like a boy.
I always thought I would never allow a child to steal from me or treat me poorly and stay in my home(the way my sons dad did to his mom). Anyone who says “I would kick them out” or says I should, hasn’t had a child become an addict. Because it’s not that easy. I sure wish it were.
On top of all of that my husband has two other older kids that have their own baggage and issues. And I have a physical disability as well. Life is a mess!
Do you guys have the equivalent of your site but dedicated for the young ones willing to seek improvement? I can find myself in this article and in some situations of others.
So it would be great if you have a sister site or just articles aimed at the young adults themselves 🙂
It won’t change our relationship
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- Continue to maintain healthy boundaries.
Meanwhile my son, only 3 was terrified staying at my apartment with me. He said it always looked like monsters were coming in the windows! ( I lived off of busy street where headlights shown through the trees behind my place and moved the shadows as the vehicle went by. It very much looked like the shadow of a large man walking past the windows).
If your kids are younger than 30’s you could hold on a little more, but don’t dwell, let them find themselves and perhaps you will be more fortunate than I. Remember, we were great parents when they were dependent on us and anything else is not our problem, it’s theirs.
Here we are, over 20 years later, with 2 suicide attempts, mental illness and one who is transgender and is choosing life altering surgery.
My daughter has a real disability and suffered incredible mental anguish. That she is alive and not in horrible trouble is a miracle. Honest to god, it’s a miracle. We get the blame for our kids being borderline, however, my ding and honestly never stopped . DBT therapy has saved her life. I’m her target the past few years and the best I can do is not interact too much to be honest.
They say, Im hard, selfish and judgement – even toxic. Yet they want my money, support and to live off me. I’m tired, and enough is enough – what do you think?
Well, I was feeling badly that my daughter (18) is sabotaging her last semester of high school and that instead of going a excellent university (in another city) she is choosing a mediocre one because she can stay home. We have saved up enough money for her to any school and stay in res. and get a meal plan. I guess she is not ready to leave the nest. But I feel she is avoiding being an adult. She has never had a boyfriend (or girlfriend which ever I don’t care) she has never had a job (although I have encouraged her to get one) because she has no money she doesn’t go out unless I pay for her evening – which i hesitate to do, so she just sits at home.
I am happily married of 22 years and have 2 boys that I love dearly
So she and her husband moved to the family housing on campus and she went her freshman year hating every minute of it. She decided that she wasn’t going back to “that” school. They moved to a different apt. They had taken on all of the responsibility of living out there to begin with, so we had no say in what they did. Now she works and he’s going to school. She claims that when he’s finished she will go back. I hope so.