A person’s sexual preferences are as unique as the person themselves. Some people like to be in control, while others prefer to let their partner take the reins. Others are down for a little bit of both, depending on their mood that night (or day – no judgments here). Some people are happy with one partner, some enjoy several. So whether you’re trying to make a baby, get your partner(s) off, or learn how to have better sex, you can find the best sex positions for any and all needs you may have between the sheets.

While every body, every relationship, and every sexual encounter is bound to be different, there are a couple of things every sexual relationship should have in common: consent and communication. “Research shows that couples who can communicate openly about sex have better sex than those who don’t,” Isiah McKimmie, couples therapist, sexologist, and coach, tells Woman’s Day. “Voicing what you want and like is important.”

It is also helpful to expand your definition of sex from simply penetrative intercourse to any consensual interaction for the purpose of pleasure, sex and relationship coach Ashley Manta says. “Stop focusing so much on penetrative sex as ‘sex,’ and start focusing on what feels good,” she tells Woman’s Day. Removing the pressure you or your partner may feel about climaxing is another thing that could make your sexual activities more enjoyable. “Orgasm is not a benchmark for success. Sometimes it’s elusive, and that’s OK,” Manta explains. “Sex doesn’t have to end just because the penis ejaculates. There are still lots of other avenues (hands, toys, oral, kissing, caressing) to make sure everyone leaves feeling satisfied .”

To figure out what sex positions work best when, Woman’s Day asked some of the top female sexual health experts to share their tips, tricks, and expertise. Here are the sex positions they say are the best for a variety of settings, body needs, and personal preferences:

When you have back pain: sitting.

By sitting on a chair, you give yourself to a chance sit upright while simultaneously enjoying sex with your partner and without increasing your back pains. “You might also consider using a ‘sex pillow’ or ‘sex chair’ that helps you find positions that take pressure off your back and knees,” McKimmie says.

Manta echoes McKimmie’s sentiment, explaining that wedging a pillow under your hips can make things even more comfortable for someone with back pains. “With the wedge under my hips, I lie face down with my legs straight and pressed together and my partner straddles me,” she explains. “My legs pressed together keeps the penis from penetrating too deeply, and the wedge under my hips helps to support my back.”

You could also put a heating pad under you if your back pains are acting up a bit, but you still want to have sex.

When you’re postpartum: spooning.

Spooning doesn’t have to only be a post-coital activity. Spooning sex is a great postpartum option: by lying down on your sides, you don’t add pressure to your probably tender belly. “It really supports slow, nurturing sex and allows you to control the depth of penetration,” McKimmie says. She also suggests side-by-side, which is similar to spooning, but you and your partner are facing each other.

It’s important to note, however, that before having sex postpartum you should not only have the go-ahead from your physician, but also check in with yourself and make sure you have the physical and emotional energy to engage in sex. “It is perfectly OK to say ‘no’ to having intercourse but still engage in mutual self-pleasure or self-pleasure, or to be with one’s partner while they pleasure themselves,” Dr. Stephanie Buehler, psychologist and AASECT certified sex therapist, director of The Buehler Institute in Orange County, CA, and author of Counseling Couples Before, During, and After Pregnancy, tells Woman’s Day.